9 Steps To Super Clean Teeth!

9 Steps To Super Clean Teeth! BBYCGN

 9 Steps To Super Clean Teeth!

“You have the cleanest teeth in history”, said my dentist, as tears formed in his eyes. “Do not tell anyone your secret, or else I will be out of a job”, he threatened with a disguised laugh. Hoo-hoo-ha-ha-ha!

But I will tell you my secret, my dear WordPress Friends! Do you know why I will tell you this classified information (against my mad dentist’s wishes)? Well, as I was leaving his office, he gave me a free toothbrushbut it was not a cool toothbrush for like a grownup; rather, it was a lame fairytale-princess toothbrush for a toddler!

Thus, here are my top-secret “9 Steps” to super clean (dentist-hated), teeth:

1). Oil Pulling (Coconut Oil);

2). Waterpick (Water Flosser: do not aim in the eye, or nostrils!);

3). Toothbrush (Soft);

4). Baking Soda;

5). Tongue Scraper (no need to go so far back as to set off gag response, and vomit);

6). Dental Floss (far less mundane if you watch TV while doing this procedure);

7). Dental “Brush Picks”;

8). Hydrogen Peroxide (alternate every few days with Listerine… I prefer the amber-colored one, just because it burns so bad);

9). Use a Purple Tablet to See Missed Areas (before rinsing off your purple teeth, always go look out the window and give any passerby’s a big grin to save money on ever needing a Home Security System).

9 Steps To Super Clean Teeth! BBYCGN

9 Steps To Super Clean Teeth!

Directions: I do all the above “9 Steps” twice a day, except for Step #1 (I only perform this maneuver once a day, if I get to it), Step #7 (sometimes I miss this step, on purpose), and Step #9 (I never do this step because I already have a Home Security System, and therefore, need not freak my neighbors out).

*Note: Do not worry, my dear WordPress Friends, what I do, what I do not do; I am merely suggesting, by my “9 Steps”, what you should do.

I carry out this performance (some of it), twice a day. Since it’s a timely process, however, performing the (above) dental routine more often, such as three times a day, could cause the neglect of eating, staying hydrated, exercising, doing laundry, feeding the pets, ETC.,.

Even for someone, such as myself, who eats tons of hard, sticky, gooey candy, and used to work as an Oompah Loompah in Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory (until I got fired when he saw all his profits dripping down my chin), I am proof that this hellish routine works!

Note* If I get any threatening comments, I will know they are coming from you, Dr. Cavattack. (Muah)!

Copyright BBYCGN

9 Steps To Super Clean Teeth! BBYCGN

9 Steps To Super Clean Teeth! BBYCGN


  1. Nice post….

    I still have quite a few milk teeth, at age 41. I had 3 wisdom teeth removed, but one came through fine. I lost a baby teeth only a few years ago, and luckily had an adult tooth come up still. But many of my adult ones did not come through due to having an eating disorder early in my teens, so I have gaps unfortunately. I may have more to come in future. My teeth are weird shaped, and I hate smiling with teeth. But they are healthy and strong.
    If I had the money I would get them all done.
    My baby teeth are still going strong after all these years, and my dentist always says my oral hygiene is excellent. I’ve only had 3 fillings in my life. That’s it. So I think that stands for itself that my teeth are good and strong.
    As to the colour of teeth, they actually shouldn’t be white white, as in very white. Teeth are like an ivory to white colour. Too much whitening can actually damage the enamel. But of course try and tell that to all the movie stars! Many of them have fake teeth, and have had them done.

    I use one of the electric toothbrushes because of the head being small and can reach right at back, but also use it like a normal toothbrush, and I am not gentle… and I always brush my tongue….
    I have only ever brushed my teeth once a day. And use mouthwash at night. And I floss about once a week lol! Probably sounds awful….but unless I eat something like corn on a cob or sometimes sticky meat or something, or sometimes fruit, then nothing really gets caught in my teeth.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Michelle, it was fun to hear about your own dental practices… ha haha.

      Sometimes when I am so sleepy at night, I dread doing my teeth! This is typically when I skip Steps 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8, & 9… and use African Licorice Chew Sticks. They really work! (I forgot to add that to my Steps).

      🦷 🦷 🦷

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Yeah, its at night when I often will just use mouthwash, as I am tired and can’t be bothered to brush.
        I always brush in mornings, as that’s when usually everyone has worst breath because our mouth has been closed for eight hours or so, and usually dehydrated….

        Liked by 2 people

  2. Want to swap teeth, Nika??
    I hadn’t thought of Hydrogen Peroxide, though I do have some kind of anti-bacterial type of mouthwash that I bought just the other week (after my nasty dentist said my gums aren’t too great). I’ll have to see if that’s got HP in it. Thanks for sharing your tips!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Pingback: My Homepage

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.